expecting... emotions.

Being pregnant is one of the weirdest things ever. Don't get me wrong, it's amazing. Knowing that inside of me there is a little one growing and he was made through love... it's something that men will never understand and girls only fully get when it happens to them. But everything that goes along with it, is just strange. All the emotions, needs, wants.

I can be happy one minute, upset the next, then mad for no reason. I am scared and nervous all the time. But only in little pieces. Evey day that I get closer to bringing this little guy to the world I am more excited about seeing him, scared about the birth and I have no idea what I am doing. Lol. It's awesome. One of those things God made that we will never figure out. I understand that it's all hormones and instinct but at the same time, it's so much more then that.

Ryder kicks ALL the time. When I'm eating or laying down. And I love it. I love feeling him inside me knowing that right now, I am what is keeping him going, Just like he will be doing for me in a few months. When all I want to do is sleep because I'm up all the time. But I know that seeing his little face, feeding him, even just looking at him while he is sleeping is going to make those hard months indescribable.